Dickinson College

The annual spoof issue, The Drinkinsonian, tackles various aspects of college life in a satirical manner.

The Mermaid Players and Department of Theater and Dance present the spring mainstage production, a dark comedy premiering this weekend. Vice President for Enrollment and College Relations Robert Massa is named as a member of the American Council on Education, one of only 38 educators nationwide to receive this honor. An Evangelical Christian group from Washington, Pennsylvania comes to campus and hands out inflammatory fliers to students, who were outraged and alerted DPS.

Three minority Greek organizations inquire about possibly gaining chapters at Dickinson. These organizations include Kappa Alpha Psi, Sigma Lambda Beta and Delta Sigma Theta. Once again, the applicant pool for admissions reaches a record high and the acceptance rate drops to 42%, making Dickinson more elite. The Zatae Longsdorff Center for Women donates over 25 years' worth of documents to the college archives, extending the college's collection of materials relating to women's history at the school. Kappa Alpha Theta and Multi-Organizational Board host a benefit concert.

The annual events Mr. Dickinson and the Polar Bear Plunge are held for charitable causes. Women's basketball prepares for the NCAA tournament after losing in the Centennial Conference Championships.

The women's bathroom in the upper level of the HUB is remodeled to the delight of females and dismay of the males who are fighting for a remodel of their own. However, the next project will be redoing the women's restroom in the basement of the HUB. DPS changes the requirements necessary to drive campus-owned vehicles.

Extreme propaganda posters are hung up in residence halls warning against being trusting of suspicious persons after a 44 year-old man was caught trespassing in Baird-McClintock. The online room-draw system is put on hold for another year until all the glitches have been worked out, sending student back into the Social Hall for the housing lottery one last time. The Women's Basketball team continues their post-season, moving up in the conference to hold second place.

As fraternity rush season takes off, Kappa Sigma fraternity considers reapplying for recognition on campus after being suspended in 2004. The TV ad-hoc committee established recently by Student Senate releases a poll of potential cable channels to be added to Dickinson's repertoire. MOB and Delta Sigma Phi fraternity hold a CD release party for a local student band. A former technician in the biology department is charged with stealing $146,000 from the school by charging personal purchases to a department credit card and submitting false receipts for reimbursement.

Dickinson students are sued by their landlord for the way they treated their apartment. Sigma Chi fraternity, who recently sued the college, is denied preliminary injunction. The new Associate Dean Tim Poirier arrives on campus to assist his former colleague April Vari. At least fourteen Dickinson students join an anti-war demonstration in Washington D.C. Pennsylvania raises its minimum wage and thus Dickinson student workers see a pay increase.

The illegal distribution and sale of prescription drugs such as Adderall and Ritalin becomes very present on campus. A tuition increase for the 2007-2008 school year is announced, much to the dismay of students though it seems that they understand the reasons behind the increases. Although it meets the national and state safety requirements, Kaufman Hall still contains levels of toxins too high for Dickinson standards which will be handled over winter break. Pulitzer Prize winner Rita Dove comes to Dickinson as the recipient of the 2006 Stellfox Award.

The owners of Casa Mani, a popular local coffee shop, express plans to build a coffee cart in the library for Dickinson students. Juniors, especially those studying abroad, express their distaste for the current application process for living off campus. Fourteen students and four faculty members commit their winter breaks to a service trip to Jamaica. The Dance Theatre Group prepares for its fall concert "Possible Landscapes" featuring four faculty-choreographed pieces. The Women's Cross Country Team become NCAA National Champions. Both the men's and women's swim teams are undefeated.